I was diagnosed with Postnatal Depression at 6months postpartum but to be honest, I know I was suffering much earlier than that, probably starting during pregnancy.

During this time my husband has been there, always by my side, being my rock. I couldn’t have survived without his support. I’m writing this letter to thank him.

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Dear husband,

Can you believe it’s only a few weeks until our son’s first birthday? What a year it has been… certainly not how I’d imagined it would turn out. As you know my mental health took a serious downturn after the birth of our son. I wish things had been different but I really want to thank you for all your support over the last year.

Thank you for always being there when I was upset, lending your shoulder to cry on and holding me tight.

Thank you for playing with our son and showing him smiles when I wasn’t able to. This really helped me feel less guilty about my health projecting negatively onto him.

Thank you for making me laugh. You’d see I was in a miserable mood and instead of joining me in the cloud of depression, you’d play the clown and do something that would be impossible not to smile at.

Thank you for putting up with my outlashes, I’m pretty sure I’d never have been able to forgive you so quickly if you’d said some of the mean things that I’ve screamed at you. I want you to know that it was the illness talking, I love you more than words can say and never meant to say anything hurtful.

Thank you for working so hard everyday so that we have the money to survive. Your generosity still overwhelms me. You are always there when I need you. You come home after a long hard day and still take the time to help me with our son. I’m sorry you’d sometimes have to come home to a crying wife, that can’t be easy but you really have amazed me with your constant care.

Thank you for being patient and stepping up to look after our son, when I had absolutely no strength. There have been so many times when I couldn’t handle his crying and was at a total loss. You always stay calm and soothe both him and me.

Thank you for your kind words. I will always remember how you told me that you vowed to be with me in sickness & health. You’ve really stood by that promise, I’ll forever appreciate your support.

Thank you for supporting me throughout this journey and encouraging me seek the help I needed. You stood by me when I was frightened to take the steps towards support, I may not have had the strength without you.

Thank you for staying so calm when I told you that I didn’t want to be here anymore. I honestly cannot imagine how I’d deal with hearing the person I loved telling me that. You were calm, reassuring and supportive – just what I needed.

I love you more every day, I’m so grateful to have such a wonderful man to call my husband and also the father of my son.

Love you forever

xxx